as i am listening to this song i suddenly feel the love within our section. i cant believe im actually realising this only now and at this current moment. the truth is i love our section. i feel a sudden sadness and .. and .. something else that really brings turns my mood blue. i think this is the most colourful post i ever has. anyways i feel the love! even though there are various people showing off about their so called section love infront of me like almost all the time. which is probably just an act~ they're just lying to themselves. and lying to yourselves wont get you anywhere.

its just an act anyways. it'll end sooner or later. its only the matter of time. besides your so called bond is all an act as well~ so who cares. oh ya thats right. you took us as stepping stones. well i wish you best of luck of surviving throughout the rest of your life in your own world of lies. we tried to change and teach you. but you wont listen. so you'll only end up sobbing the crap out of yourselves. nothing to do with us. everything crumbles under your feet anyways. would you care for the presence of the stepping stones which enabled you to cross the river?
sorry about not being able to update this for a very long time. i was kind of caught up in revising for the stupid exams. why have exams in the first place. not like anyone cares for the environment when we study geography. like anybody would put their heart to conserving our environment and saving our half destroyed Earth. Plus, like there is anywhere i Singapore to dig up for dinosaur bones. whats the use of all these anyways?? not like we want to become the emperor of china or look for those ancient egypt mummies or whatever.

whats the use for these subjects. i can understand for english chinese science and mathematics but the others?? what about literature. im so not going to become a poet nor am i going to write short stories of any theme using profound english. afterall my english is terrible. Whats the world coming to?!

anyways. i slept at 3+ am last night. that was the latest time ive ever gone to bed and the only time i dont feel tired at all. watched this weird show last night. something about some people being possessed by this "devil". oh wells i better get going now. goodbye.

love does not exist in this world anymore. does it? have you seen any love lately? have you displayed love lately? was it love or was it just a moment of highness that you act like you care for something or someone.
hellos. we had ep today! and today's date was 13! how terrible. its my register number. and it just so happens that we had to impromtu speeches. is that how you say it? i think so. it is like someone gives you a subject and you think of it for a few minutes and then start your speech and talk for about 1 to 2 minutes, which i think i did for about 3minutes or so.

the theme given to me was about my family. well now! that, i have tonnes to say. but i somehow feel "naked" out of a sudden. i just told my entire class about my family. and the situation it is in now. i have broken my wall down! the wall that had been separating the class and me! oh no! im becoming more confident in voicing out my opinions! i cannot do that!! though im still so quiet in class and would only dare to speak aloud infront of crowds as it was neccesary due to the marks given for it.

sigh! being too confident and "daring" aint that good. i just dont find it that good. anyways. i guess i did pretty well for the speech. i hope people listened. sighh! i guess my theme was simple compared to the other themes given to my other classmates. actually being the least noticed aint that bad afterall. at least you dont have to worry about being sabotaged into things. =D

but its good to gain confidence. but i still trembled a little when i went up there. hahas. maybe it can help me excel in various activities! such as.... hahas anyways. thank you roxanne for lending me fruits basket =]] and continue guessin gthe show im watching. hahas i think i should end here. goodbye.
hellos. how time flies. its like 3 years behind the stage practising and in only about 3 hours all the efforts that was put in. all the time we've spent in the band room practising like crap. and in a flash of the eye, its over. im not sure whether im relieved or something else. it seems like a dream. everything had passed so fast.

that was the first Fantasia Concert ive taken part in. it was also the first time ive been to Victoria Concert Hall. it looked so classical. also, the back stage seemed like a cabin. there were rooms for each section to put our instruments and stuff. so cool! our room was led by a flight of stairs into our own "little world". its like damn cute looking. so small and really seem like a cabin on a cruise or something.

i got so nervous ladt night. though it was only at first when i stepped onto the stage infront of 800++ people. and yes i heard my name being shouted a few times. hahas thanks people! anyways. after a while i just used to it. whenever i stood up, i would look at the extreme end of the seats all the way back at the door. so i wouldnt see any familiar faces. lols. it was scary. it got ok after that.

i guess we played pretty well last night. the ensembles were nice. no! i should say we played freaking good last night. hahas! i got 2 stalks of flowers =D. how sweet of them. thank you!

and we had our 2.4km run today. was so freaking tired especially when i reached home at 11pm++. feel so sleepy now. oh wells, not like i reached home the latest or anything.i think my timing was quite bad! like so slow. damn it arghs *sobs* sighh! i need to do well for my 5 items man!

i got to go now. i need to go prepare. i'll continue another time.
hellos. ok im back in my average mood. had band today. its like the last rehearsal in school. the next one we're having is on the concert day itself at victoria concert hall. its like 2 days away. how fast. i feel as if i have "contributed" to the selling of tickets. hahas. i sold a total of 14 tickets actually. which i suppose is quite little. =DD

had my first piano lesson on tuesday. well, it wasnt really counted as a lesson. the teacher only wanted to see how much we know about the piano and our theory. i dont say that my rhythm theory is good cause i know im damn bad at it. vanessa gave us "free performance" cause she played twinkle twinkle little star on the piano. while i didnt know a single song! lols. my theory wasnt that good anyways. so im actually quite nothing. i saw the pieces in grade 2 like already the sort of rhythms im playing now.

anyways. im just looking forward for the start of the lesson. we havent officially started yet. its on every tuesday! lols =DD
what crap. you want MY opinions!? i'll give you opinions! bias! mental blocked. and i hope you see this! people who act tough outside are the WEAKEST inside. there isnt such thing as a student who cannot be taught BUT a teacher who CANNOT TEACH!

and i dont care whether you idiots are challanging me but this is mighty frustrating! and its completely adding fuel to the fire burning within me LONG LONG TIME AGO! what crap. what crap. what crap! i had been tolerating my class matter my family matter and now THIS!? i just realised that im actually a very tolerant already. and its at my limits. i had been suffering like this for ALL MY LIFE!! it all starts with my family then school work then teachers and now this.. this THIS! ARGHS!!! i hate this... im getting tired.. i really dont wish to go around in circles anymore. i wanted to stop depressing myself. but IT DOESNT SEEM LIKE YOU IDIOTS ALLOW ME TO! i hate everything that surrounds me except for various things! i cant help by going into depression! ARGHHHHHSSS.. what good is there to life. when everything that surrounds you already SUCK THIS MUCH!